Gummy Worms

I have started dating my ex again in December 2017. Yes, we have patched back after a whole year of not talking, slowing becoming friends, thinking things through and being there for one another. It felt very long to be very honest but I am glad everything is back the way it is. Sort of. I did not celebrate New Years with him or with anyone. He celebrated at his friend's house and my god it was horrible. I wished him Happy New Year and was about to sleep when it occurred to me that he had been drinking and was really high. I ended staying up and ensuring he reached home. 

Relationship wise, there were quite a few ups and downs but I am really glad that we still stuck together. He did things that he would not enjoy for me to be happy. Currently, he is in the army which is quite tiring and upsetting. I felt torn constantly on whether to tell him certain things or not. I know he is tired and I felt bad if I mentioned more things that might stress him out. Emotionally, I have been trying to overcome the negativity from family and friends on certain issues which sometimes involves him. I am trying to convince myself that everything is alright and I will be okay instead of breaking down. 

I have to say dating an army boy is really tough at the start if you are like me, emotional and more towards the clingy side. I did not manage to see him for 3 weeks which does not seem much but considering he is the only person I text, it was really boring. If there are no jobs, I would be bored out of my mind at home. We still managed to talk for a while, not much of proper conversations, more of a standard "Hi, how was your day." and "Oh you are going to bed now? Okay.". 

But I must admit, once it starts, I got used to it really fast. It was not as hard as I expected which is a huge relief for me. He made time to meet me and so far, we have met at least once a week. Despite him being tired and sick, he really put in the effort to come and see me which I am grateful and thankful for. The downside is probably not having much time to spend with him. We usually end up chilling somewhere, be it my house or somewhere else. We never really go out anymore because he gets really tired fast. 

The latest time we met, he came to have dinner with my family. He has met my family before and I was really glad that he came. Firstly because I do not need to be alone at dinners anymore seeing that my sisters all have boyfriends and secondly, he is finally meeting my parents and hanging out with them. I am really happy to see him talk to my parents during dinner even though he usually doesn't talk much. 

I will have to admit, besides his physical appearance changing, his actions changed a lot as well. He is more clingy which is great for me because he has never been one to show a lot of affection in public. Even when it comes to things like hugging or holding hands, I could sense he was a bit uncomfortable. Now, he would suggest when to meet and even be the first to hold my hand. I know it sounds utterly stupid but I am happy that he is more clingy. Maybe army is a good thing. 

This month would be our 6th month together and I have a good feeling about this relationship. I am really genuinely happy with him and thankful for all my friends who have been supporting us and checking up on me constantly. I am grateful that my friends who haven't been too thrilled about the patch are at least making an effort to be okay with it and are open to meeting him and getting to know him.